Benedict Williams

Strange ideas and stories plucked from the murky depths of my mind

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buttonsandflowers asked: Suck my bollock anon, I think your writing is fantastic and you're also very brave to show such a private side to yourself through your art. It's real and powerful, I'm proud of you creating something so true and moving, not many people can do that.

That really means a lot, you’re a sweetheart :)

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Anonymous asked: do you actually have mental problems? Not trying to be nasty, I'm just really intrigued.

It’s cool, I just feel funny about talking about it because although I try and be open and honest about everything, it can make people uncomfortable. I wouldn’t call it mental problems, the doctors call it a severe depression and anxiety disorder. I was doing a lot better and now recently I’m doing a lot worse, but hopefully it’ll work out alright

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Anonymous asked: You come across as a massive phony. Please stop trying to be the tortured pretentious artist so much, just relax and give up the charade. I'm sure you're depressed and mopey and lost enough in your own right and decent writing can come of that, but this really is a load of trying bollocks. No need to publish this ask, I don't care for an answer. Unless of course you wish to respond defensively and publicly, in which case go right ahead.

I guess this is me being defensive, but there you go. I’m not really trying to be sad, it’d be better to be happy. I try really hard to be happy through medication and therapy and exercise and diet and hobbies. I really do make an effort at it every single day. I also wouldn’t want to project myself as a tortured artist because although I enjoy making it, I actually think my art is really shit.

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146 Plays
CKSRG

New tune by Slumba Bear. Electronic hipstery, two steppy vybes. Listen and enjoy.

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Dragons

We’re all shackled to our inner dragons, and you can cover them up and douse them in bleach

But they’re there

Plain as day


You can escape them

For a moment

You can sit at the edge of a cliff, staring out at the ocean

You can listen to a beautiful symphony, even if it’s a funeral march

You can forget that you’re a snarling sniveling wisp of a being

clinging to a cosmic pebble


If I write long enough the clackering of the keys can drown it out

I can get drunk and high and put on music and curl up in a ball and open up a new document and bleed everything out

Without making a mess

And I don’t need anyone to come lap it up

I can lie in it on my own

As long as I’m staring up at the sky

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Miniature sun

I found a little speckle of warmth somewhere

I had been looking for it for a while

A coruscating orb

I clasped it to my chest

I’m not sure if it’s there or not

But it feels real enough, some of the time

I keep it in my pocket

Away from everyone else

And sometimes it’s light enough

To stumble home with

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Anonymous asked: Don't really want to ask you anything just want to comment on how much I enjoy reading your posts! I'm a psychology student so I love the posts that explore mental illness and cognitive functioning, and also how everything ends with the point that things that happen or behaviours of people are undeniably deterministic in a way. I also studied surrealism for a bit so I really like the way you use fantasy elements to say something truthful. Please write a book or something! Thanks :)

Thankyou, that means a lot. You seem to really understand what I’m trying to do do, maybe even better than me. You should come off anon. + Plus I’ll probably start work on a book soon

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101 Plays
Cheese Spliff